Monday, September 2, 2013

betwixt and between...

 betwixt and between alright

summer is ending and fall is not quite ready to appear... the days are still very hot but the nights are cool and darkness comes earlier with each passing day

i am reluctant to begin anything new, yet finishing old projects has been a lesson is tedium

i've cleared out most of the summer clothes from the closet and dresser, yet it's still too early to start packing
i content myself with thinking about what i will take...

and in the midst of these last busy, busy days, where my mind is skittering from thoughts of the present to the past and back to the future

i decided it was time to try meditation


i've always been a thinker

getting lost in thoughts - accused of daydreaming constantly, from the time i was chil, but never anything formal

i'll say this - it's been interesting...

i hadn't any specific expectations for what i hoped meditating might do for me, other than perhaps a clearer, less cluttered mind

i'm not sure if that's happened yet, except that perhaps i am somewhat more aware of my thoughts

but what did happen, in that first week really surprised me...

you know how when you get a facial the esthetician will tell you your face might be a little sensitive for a few days, might even break out a bit?
 from all the impurities and excess oil being purged from your skin?

well, i think meditating might be making all my evil thoughts come to the surface, threatening to spill out of my mouth at the first opportunity...

in the first few days, i found myself a bit, well, a bit snappish

annoyed with people

impatient...

and needing a superhuman amount of will power not to say everything i was thinking as soon as the thought flashed 
(there might have been a few slip-ups... yeesh)

i started out full of good thoughts, high ideals and a generous will
but if those around didn't seem to be displaying the same thoughtful considerations, look out!

i'm feeling a little more like my old self today... and decided it was high time i understand this whole business a little better


i scoured the internet, reading a few articles here and there but today i decided i needed a good old-fashioned book

it had me with the prettiness of the cover... i'll let you know about the text!

on another note, another betwixt and between at this time of year is my herb garden

some are just coming into flower, others are just past their prime

what has delighted me more than anything else this year is the love affair the bees are having with the marjoram

at any given moment there is between 15 and 30 buzzing busily about


honey bees and bumble bees - they love the marjoram even better than the lavender
 
and with all you hear about the struggle the bees are having, it is so gratifying to know that my little clump of marjoram is of real benefit
 
a good deed indeed...


6 comments:

Draffin Bears said...

Hi Jillayne,

Life is heavenly and hope you will be able to find your inner peace through meditation. Looks like a great book and the cover is appealing.
Wishing you a happy week
Hugs
Carolyn

FlowerLady Lorraine said...

Dear Jillayne ~ I pray you will find peace and be blessed. God is my source of peace, without Him I would be a basket case.

Reading Psalms is very comforting to me too.

Have a great week and do let us know what you think of this book.

A lot of times when we are conscious of wanting to change something in our lives, we will have flack at first

Love and hugs ~ FlowerLady

karen said...

I hope the meditation gets you prepared for the madness of London. Maybe you could bring that book with you as there are quite a few people there who need it! You will see....By then hopefully you will be the most chilled person in the World......
http://karenannruane.typepad.com/karen_ruane/

Alisa Noble said...

Ah, meditation.
I have found that sitting and staring at a wall and focusing on my breathing does not work for me.
The only thing I've found is walking. Sometimes, and not all the time, while out for a walk I will find that inner focus without trying and then all of a sudden I realize I am truly in the moment just observing and being. And it always fills me with joy.
I wish you good luck, Jillayne, with working it all out!

Dorthe said...

I never tried meditation, Jillayne- so don`t know if I would be good with that... but I have the feeling, I`m too impatient!!
I wish you to have good use of it, and maybe reading your new book ,you can better work it out!!
Happy hours selecting your wardrobe to take along on vacation, soon :-)
Hugs, from Dorthe

Createology said...

You are amazing my dear. In the midst of all you are doing and preparing for you select meditation. Must be a sign from above. I am not good at meditating...stopping my incessant brain from over thinking everything (the word worrying really fits here!). Life is Heavenly and we must enjoy every moment we have...