Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A Helping Hand

In the days leading up to my sale I spent a lot of time with a few very good friends. They were all helping me in different ways, sharing their skills to help make everything perfect.

The sign below went a long way toward doing just that for the food table...

My best friend from school days, the one who everyone thought her and I were sisters, made this sign for me. She has taken a few calligraphy classes over the years, but I remember in high school she already had a way with lettering. 
The pin with the ribbon through it was designated for a wrist cuff I was designing when my friend and her accomplice (who was the dish-meister and the go-fer) decreed it was needed more on this sign. Given how beautiful the lettering was and the effort put forth how could I do anything but say "But of course". I also knew there was no sense arguing - one I can take on, but not two!

We propped it on a gold easel I have and placed them on a beautiful fitted tablecloth Lucille made for me (I'll show that next week) and it was perfect.

I have been thinking a lot about friendship since that weekend.
I have been lucky enough to be blessed by more than a few good friendships over the years, although some have come and gone which always puzzled me; I have been thinking of late that geography may have something to do with it. Terrible I know, but true all the same.

If I forget about things when I don't see them does the same hold true for my friends as well; do I forget them when they're gone? It seems oftentimes, when people move away or when I have moved, we eventually lose contact. There are exceptions of course, but I have had many a good friend I have truly enjoyed knowing that I am no longer in touch with. Do they think of me like I think of them, wondering where they are, how they are, where life has taken them, where they have taken life?

I may not spend time with them anymore, but I visit them in my mind and I am happy in knowing I have known them.

 Good friends, casual friends, acquaintances, bosom buddies... in a sort of weird and twisted way, the ones I really enjoy are those that when you meet on the street, you chat for a bit - the quick catch up, and then one or the other of you remarks "We really need to go for (lunch, dinner, drinks, coffee....)" and then you both laugh because you know you won't. Neither is offended, you were happy to see each other and then you go on your way, happy to know that someday you really will re-connect and that it's alright not to right now. It's the kind of understanding that comes from a friend that is in the same frame of mind, in the same place in her life. You might say they can't be a true friend or you would make the effort. I disagree, because even though I see less of them, I don't think less of them. But they let me be busy without guilt or recrimination, they let me spend time with family and others who are perhaps more in need and they allow me to be their friend without having to do anything other than enjoying their company when I am lucky enough to be in it.

And that's a good friend indeed. 

PS. Don't forget about the give away on yesterday's post, if you are interested in a little crazy-quilted stocking...


MosaicMagpie said...

Friends are funny relationships when you think about it, aren't they? Some friends feel the need to be #1 on the friendship list or their feelings are hurt. Some you know you can call in times of trouble and they will be a rock. Some friends are always ready for an adventure and will give most anything a try. A few are kindred spirits and they truly touch your heart. I agree those that you are delighted to see and greet with a hug. Talk non stop with for a few moments and leave with a promise of more time together are a treasure. Just a way of being blessed and feeling a touch of love. We all need that.

Anonymous said...

Jillayne, it's so true, we may see less of a friend but don't think less of them. Life has a way of doing things to us that unfortunately get in the way of staying connected more often to our friends. True friends don't lay a guilt trip on us when they bump into us after awhile apart. They understand that it's not personal and we pick up where we left off. We have a dear couple in our life that this happens with. She works outside the home, he's a busy doctor, and they also have new grandchildren that she babysits. It's so understandable that at this time in their lives we can't all just drop everything for a monthly dinner together. And the truth is, I think we all love one another even MORE. There's truth in the adage that "absence makes the heart grow fonder". We treasure the times we DO spend with them all the more.
Thank you for the beautiful thoughts today.

Marj Talbot said...

I totally agree. A true friend doesn't have to be one that you spend every day with but one that would stand by you no matter what and feels what you feel.
You have said it all beautifully.

Suztats said...

Lovely post! and well said.

Dorthe said...

Dear Jillayne,
I have the same thoughts like you,-and I also often thinks of friends, I do not see anymore--maybe because of living far away from each other-maybe because life comes in the way!! But when meeting on the street, we talks like there was no big pause in seing each others...that is realy amazing with some people that we will alwayes understand each other--dosn`t matter how long between talking.That is worth so much.
Loved reading your post dear friend.

connieJ said...

Excellent!!!! My sentiments, exactly.